The Diary Of Mattie Spenser by Sandra Dallas

Author:Sandra Dallas [Dallas, Sandra]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Adult, Historical, C429, Extratorrents, Kat
ISBN: 9780312187101
Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin
Published: 1998-04-27T23:00:00+00:00

The Diary of Mattie Spenser

Chapter 5

January 22, 1867. Prairie Home.

Luke has gone to Mingo, and I have gone to quilting, as I am good for little else. Came a headache last night so painful that I went outside and pressed snow against my temples in hopes the cold would drive it away. It seemed as if tiny men were inside my forehead, pounding upon the flesh with their hammers. When the snow failed to do the desired job, I built up the fire and brewed a cup of tea from the spearmint leaves Carrie dried for me. It soothed the head a little, and the soul, as well, freeing me of self-pity. After an hour or so, I was able to creep back into bed and sleep until Luke brought my hungry babe to me for his breakfast. What kind of mother is she who does not hear the cries of her wee one?

Now I sit here quietly with a handkerchief tied around my head to keep the tiny miscreants from returning with their tools and resuming their mischief. These headaches always leave me drained, with a feeling that I am sitting elsewhere in the room, watching my poor self.

The quilt with its Flying Geese pattern brings happy memories of home, as it is made with so many scraps from my piece bag. I had been stitching around a triangle made of goods left over from Carrie’s graduation dress. But due to the aftermath of the headache, my hands are stiff, and the needle picks at the material. I might just as well quilt a cracker. So I set aside the work and turn to my journal.

I give a great deal of thought to Persia’s cruel words of last year, but I keep them locked inside my bosom, for I refuse to attach unnecessary importance to them by discussing the truth of the matter with Luke. I know he cared for Persia once, having kept company with her for many years, and all (including Self) believed the two of them would wed one day. Even though Luke was her lover once, I have concluded that upon returning to Fort Madison two years ago, he found her unsuitable for his life’s companion on a Colorado homestead, so sought a better candidate. That was when he came “a-courtin’ ” to our farm.

Persia spoke to me out of spite, being jealous of our happy Prairie Home. I am persuaded that no matter what Luke’s feelings were for her in the past, he loves me, else why would he have resumed the marital act just two weeks after I lost the babe at Christmas, and with such frequency? No, Luke is mine alone, to be shared only with Johnnie. Luke loves Baby almost as much as I do, and that is very much indeed. I believe he is more than satisfied with his little family, and I am determined to put Persia’s claims out of my mind.

Luke and I are settled in this winter like an old married couple.

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